The Limerick Digest. No.1: LimEUricks

The news, for those who haven’t the time, as communicated by the ghost of Edward Lear.

This week: Britain covers itself in glory, as direct democracy avoids the pitfalls of fact or reasoned debate. And millions around the globe wait to see if the inhabitants of the UK will get their country back, whilst asking what exactly it looks like, and where did they last have it?

No.1: The Owl and the Autocrat

 

There once was a man called Farage,

Who sailed down the Thames on a barge,

He declaimed: ‘But it’s true,

If it weren’t for the EU,

I’d have had a boat two times as large’.

 

No.2: Farage Redux

 

That mad former banker Farage,

Routinely the facts did massage,

He howled: ‘EU sods,

Stop us fishing our cods,

Though this clearly was nought but mirage

 

No.3: The UKIP strikes back

 

There was an old chap from UKIP,

Who sailed nary to sea in a ship,

Cried out he: ‘Why dwell so,

On news from 2 weeks ago?’

In this post’s case an apposite quip.

 

No.4: Unfair generalisations of the most toxic kind

 

An Isle in the midst of the sea,

Decided it’s need to be free,

From the EU’s red tape,

So it made it’s escape,

On the back of a racist or three.

 

No.5: Appease is a dirty word

 

The Honorable Member for Witney

Had a hard time campaigning though didn’t he?,

A bloke raised a hue,

Said he thought he could view,

Some resemblance to old Neville’s ministry.

 

No.6: No-score draw

 

That foolhardy bunch called Remain,

Couldn’t help but from facts go a-straying,

They said ‘Brussels goes halves,

On your tabs at the bars

And your mortgage they’re already paying’.

 

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